Reading the brail of the world beneath your belly.
Translate the tale of woe.
Go unnoticed but notice all.
Slink along an inch at a time.
But leave a trail for others to fallow.
Blind and hiding among a fragile shell.
Your only noise will be the end.
With Love
2 comments:
As I said in class, I like a lot about this one. I mentioned that "among" is an awkward word choice, and that the poem would probably be more powerful if it were condensed (and maybe also if more attention were given to line breaks). For example:
Reading the braille
of the world
with your belly,
translate its tale
of woe.
Go unnoticed but
notice all,
slink along an inch
at a time, retire,
but leave a trail
for others
to follow.
No one follows.
the ending lost me a little. love the concept of the snail trail. great descriptions.
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